Stick to your guns. Put your foot down. Don’t be a doormat. Shit.

I didn’t. I have been lulled into passive agressive codependent interactions. I keep holding on to the sweet way he said he would try harder to learn about the nature of my conditions. I let my guard down.
We just passed our thirteenth wedding anniversary. We went out to dinner. It was a good meal but nobody in the restaurant would have suspected we were celebrating anything.

I need to blame his behavior on his job. On the stress and long hours. The hour commute. He screamed at me because he is trying to keep our budget in order. Not because he hates me. I’m sure deep down he knows it’s my hypomanic compulsive news that’s behind my shopping. My therapist vouched for me two weeks ago.

“I don’t think it’s unreasonable” is just his insecurity talking. He can’t possibly …

I have let my boundaries slip away. Because I can’t handle the thought of our routine changing. I desperately need for this person who says those ugly things to disappear back to the depths of hell from whence he came. That man is going to meet mama bear if he doesn’t chill.

No person, no family, no society exists in a vacuum. Evolution is a constant. I am different because I have worked hard to find awareness. Such a brutal work schedule, diabetes, plus mega diagnoses for your wife and kid trashes the mind.

While I understand the underlying causes, I won’t allow the outward appearance of them in my home. I will not allow my children to live with it.

I have put the ground rules in writing. I am going to post them in plain site. They will be observed or the offender will go.

The issue is not the issue and I am calling it out.